Sunday, February 20, 2011

What Matters?

I guess I should give a quick update on my life. I have not posted a new blog in a very long time (over a month!). I am back at school in Texas, in my last semester of college before I graduate. That, in itself, is a scary thought. I am taking 15 credits, pretty much all general education courses: Life and teaching of Christ, Romans, English comp 2, Tolkien (literature elective), and flight instructor theory. This load has been keeping me fairly busy. With every new semester comes new and different challenges. This semester seems to be the challenges of papers.  In just about 1.5-2 weeks, I have about 5 papers/projects due. Also, in 17 days, I am taking my oral and practical tests to become an airframe and powerplant mechanic. (2 day test on everything you know). As you can imagine, I've been a bit overloaded. With flight instructor theory, we are meeting with private students every week and teaching them different aviation related topics. This has been quite the learning experience. For that class, in the end, we are supposed to write about a 200 page notebook which has outlines of all material needed to be taught to become a pilot. Needless to say, with everything else going on, I have not had time to start this notebook. As a result, I am thinking I might just drop the course at the end of the semester considering I do not need the credit hours.

On the job front: I have a possible job offer with Dynamic Aviation if a job opens up. I would love to work for them, considering I know the company and it is one of the few jobs that would actually be flying and maintenance. This summer, right after I graduate, I am going with my family up to Alaska. After our trip, I may stay in Alaska and go to Kingdom Air Corps. http://kingdomaircorps.org/welcome.html  I would be working on airplanes there, learning mountain flying, possible float rating as well. I would also be helping out at a Bible camp. Depending on whether or not a job comes through with Dynamic, Dwayne King said he might be able to get me a job up in Alaska. Who would have thought living in Alaska! At this point, I really just don't know. I am exploring the options for other jobs as well and will keep you posted.

On the social front: I am still living in the apartments this semester. This has its pros and cons like I have said in the past. Quite is nice for the most part, and having a bunch of extra space and a full size kitchen. I celebrated another singles awareness day (valentines day) this year, and am totally fine with that. After my Junior summer, and going into my Senior year at college, I came to peace with the fact that I will not find my future spouse. A couple of months is not enough time to get to know someone enough to start dating. Besides, I like the single life right now. Less complicated, expensive, and all around freer to do what you want and not worry about what the significant other's plans are. It is nice not to be infatuated with anyone or spend the effort to try and earn their affection. I also have no idea where I will end up a year from now. I could be in Alaska, I could be in Virginia. I could be overseas for all I know. I am not ready or mature enough to be married. That is a huge responsibility and commitment. I am not saying I can't be committed, I am just saying I'm not ready to put myself in that type of situation. I like being free and doing whatever I want whenever I want-- in other words, not worrying about how my choices would affect a significant other.

I have been thinking a bit about what a friend of mine said who recently graduated. They said something along the lines of wishing they had enjoyed their friends more the last semester. That is hitting home for me, I am so wrapped up with just trying to pass all my courses and take my maintenance tests that I don't have time or spend much time enjoying friends. I keep reminding myself that there will always be work to be done- even after graduation. Something will always need to be done. I think I need to learn how to be more laid back and care-free to an extent. Right now, I am obsessive with getting the job done (graduating) to get to the next stage in life (job?). Once I cross that stage, my GPA does not really matter. A lot of things really don't matter anymore school related. What lasts? What goes on with you? For one, your personality and character. Other aspects are your friends and relationships. Of course your career skills and knowledge too. I think we (at least I do) often overemphasize the last and don't worry about the first couple. In addition, a couple areas we don't think about are our habits and our beliefs which carry on and significantly change how we live our life.

I want to look at a couple of these aspects in my own life. First, character/personality. I was talking with a friend over break, and I asked him to describe me and just what he thought about me. He came back with a very interesting answer. (I am paraphrasing here and writing all that I can remember as accurately as I can.) He said something along the lines of me having a wife would be really good- since I am highly concerned with integrity and loyalty and people caring for each other. I think he pointed out that I want to stay connected with the people I care about most. I want to maintain friendships so much that I often don't know how to. I mess up and will not speak my mind if a problem, what I perceive to be, occurs. I don't like conflict, but I like exactness, keeping things whole, doing things well.

The second aspect I want to look at is habits, in relationship to beliefs. Someone once said, what you are now is what you are later. This was specifically said in regards to people wanting to serve Jesus Christ overseas on the mission field. What you are now, in the United States; your character, habits, personality, struggles, and beliefs, will be what you are overseas. I've been thinking about this on and off. How much do I love Jesus now while I am in college? How much will I love Jesus later? How much do I pray now? How much do I read the Bible now? How much do I preach now? How much do I evangelize and reach out to the lost and hurting in the world? How much do I serve? Sacrifice? Love? How much does God know mE? How close am I to God now? What do I struggle with now? What pain and burdens do I carry now? What are my idols now? What am I addicted to? What takes my time away from God? What do I care about and what makes me tick? How much am I involved with the church? How much am I apathetic and pessimistic? How much am I all of these things now? Who do I really want to be? We must choose who we want to be, before we choose who we want to become. (Andy Stanley: Who Before What) http://vimeo.com/9286835

God is a big God. He can handle my life by His grace; but am I willing to live for God? Do I go after God with all my heart? Is He really all that matters in my life? I can personally say what I see myself as now, and what I will be next week scares me. I'm not talking about worldly issues that I am concerned about- like loosing weight. I'm talking about spiritual issues. When was the last time I led someone to Christ? Have I ever? When was the last time I talked about spiritual issues with someone? When was the last time I talked about God? When was the last time I shared my faith?-- Can't I not count the times on my hands? Some may say sure, I have definitely been a witness and a light to many Christians by the way I live my life. I am not discounting that fact that all Christians are in some way a light to each other by our actions and words.* What about others? What about the hurting? What about Christ's hands and feet, the church, in the world, looking outwards instead of inwards? I am so wrapped up in me me me that I forget about God and loving others. Life is not about me, not about what I do, not even about how much i make, what I own, who i know. Life is about our creator, God, Jesus, restoring the world. We are just a small little pieces to a mass painting that is happening all around us. Often I think we forget this, and are concerned more about us, then we are about God.

*I think there is a real aspect of spiritual warfare here too. I think the devil wants us to think that we are not making any impact on the lives of those around us, and as thus will feed us that lie. "You don't matter, you have not done anything." This is an easy lie to buy, especially when we do not see any marked change and life just goes on an on like normal. Small actions do not go unnoticed though by people. Even a simple hello can brighten a person's day who is down in the dumps and just needs someone to talk to or hug or a smile.

God is big, God is huge, God can do anything. He can take my life and transform me into a godly man of Christ and radically reshape my worldviews (like he did to the apostle Paul). I often wish this were the case, that all of a sudden I was this awesome godly man and was making a difference in the world* that is saving lost souls, caring for the poor, etc. That is my ultimate goal I suppose in a way, if it was all for Christ, and not about me at all. I just want to be strong* and live what I preach. In a way, our trials produce more faith. Holding on to a sliver of hope in God that He will do what He promises to do.  And we boast in the hope of the glory of God.  Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;  perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.


Trials are hard. I often give in to the world and to idolatry. I put things in front of God. It is easy to give in to the power of sin. I start comparing myself to other Christians. I want to be so consumed for a love for God, that my passion for useless stuff that does not matter in eternity takes the back burner.

The following is taken from: http://www.benterry.com/passion-2011-louie-giglio-session-1


Louie Giglio kicks off Passion 2011 speaking on delighting in Christ as your supreme joy so that nothing in this world matters. Recognizing that to live as Christ and to die is gain should be our anthem. 
Here are some notes from Louie’s talk:
“God uses young people to change the world.” Giglio points at the Mark Zuckerbug did change the world.
“We must focus on the things that are essential rather than the short term goals and stay truly locked in on our satisfaction of Jesus over anything else.”
***“Lord, drown out all desire for everything that doesn’t matter in the end.”
“The only thing that matters in the end is Jesus who sits on the throne.”
Philippians 1:1 starts off saying “Paul” means that all things can be made new. Used to be known as Saul now is made new. Paul demonstrates that he was a new creation.
“God changed everything about Paul.”
“It’s not unlike God to choose anyone in this building and completely change everything about you to make you an agent for his name.”
“We all were enemies with God. We were all in opposition with God. God has brought us into a friendship and reconciled with God.”
“It cost people a lot to push forward the Gospel of Jesus Christ.”
***“Jesus, will You make Your presence so real in my life that it drowns out the desire for anthing else in my life.”
“Circumstances have no power over us being free and fully alive in Christ {See Paul in Phil. 1} I am in chains for Christ vs 13″
“Living is all about Jesus. He is the prize, we die and we win. We live and they hear about Him. Sweet deal it’s a win-win.”
“We think doing our own thing is freedom, but that’s slavery. Freedom comes from choosing a chain: Jesus and connecting to Him”
“When you say “I do” to 1 woman, you’re saying “I don’t” to every other woman on the planet.”

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